And before that...

MARS IS HERE, MONSIEURS ET MADEMOISELLES! She is totally fucking in my living room area and she is sometimes even standing over my shoulder.

It's been something of a weekend cause my grandmother died. This morning; she was in her 90s, she was my father's mother and we never spoke the same language, but the times I saw her she had these huge, beatific, seriously saint-like smiles on her face, and she just exuded love. And I'm bummed I didn't know her better, bummed is really not the word, bummed is like the 17 year old stoner version of the emotion. I am upset that i didn't know her better. Not upset at anyone, i'll admit there was a time when i was like "DAD, why didn't you teach us taiwanese" but i know now that it wasn't that simple. But I regret that I don't speak the same language as one side of my family. I am glad I met my grandmother, but I would have like to have known her some, known her side of the family a little and known what went down. I don't know. Whole thing is fucking me up especially cause christmas three time zones away reeeeeally took me for an emotional ride i was not anticipating.

Anyway. 2001 starts today.

2000 was a somewhat intense year.

Whoda fuckin thunk, right?

2001, the twenty four hours of it that have so far occurred, have not been the best. Course, the turnover of 2000 sucked on account of I was on call for stupid Y2K at AOL.

So this year is a New Year, and mars and i are together, and we're going to write our resolutions together, and I would like to dedicate 2000, and in fact every year i've lived so far, given that zero of them were possible without her intervention, to Ama. Happy New Year, Ama.

And I love my father. And my mother. And my sister.

Mmkay. Gnight.

-mary