And before that...

I just met my "Little Sister"... she is smart as a whip and funny and nice and she wants to make a website so we are gonna have plenty to do. I'm supposed to call her my "Mentee" cause I am her "Mentor" but "Mentee" sounds too much like "Manatee" to me. Seacow!

Seacow seacow seacow!

Ok. I have to say something. What is the big fucking deal with Pet Sounds? How come every indie rock fanboy and burgeoning or wannabe rock crit has to pretend that it is The Best Album ever made, or like "oh yeah, i dont' really like the Beach Boys... except Pet Sounds!" Do you know what Pet sounds is? Pet sounds is like, the secret password for "i am a music snob... or just look like one!" and it has, i'm fairly certain at this point, absolutely nothing whatsofuckingever to do with the qualities of the album itself. I officially think anyone who tells me that Pet Sounds is the best album is um, a STUPID IDIOT that i don't like. It's just not all that. It's a beach boys record! Maybe it's better than other beach boys records and maybe it's been influential or whatever but like, not THAT influential, and not like, surprising... I mean with all the accolades heaped on it this decade, when i first listened to it i was expecting some huge revelation, some secret musical side to Brian Wilson that made it through on this album but was squelched otherwise by record execs or something but... IT'S A BEACH BOYS RECORD! Quit faking you big fakers!

So anyway, Pet Sounds is not the secret password for "I'm a music snob" anymore, it's the secret password for "I think what rock critics tell me to think!"

Oh man, and if you look at CDNow under the Beach Boys, there are no fewer than FIVE Pet Sounds releases! FOUR IN THIS DECADE! The most recent one, and oh god, i can't tell you how long and hard i laffed at this, the most recent one has all thirteen tracks in mono, and then ALL AGAIN IN STEREO! Ok a) if you really, really need to hear these tracks in mono, HIT THE MONO BUTTON ON YOUR STEREO! If you dont' have the strength, FIND SOMEONE TO PUSH IT FOR YOU! b) anyone who really really needs to hear these tracks in mono out of some sort of quest for authenticity does not deserve to be catered to.

Ok i am repeating a lot of what i said today in a conversation with andrew and i hate it when i do stuff like that cause i feel like my writing process is all naked and people can see my underpants but GAWD! It had to be said again, in public.

In conclusion, PET SOUNDS MY HINEY!