And before that...

Another lazy list of facts:

1) Turbo my pet wild chipmunk was back the other day, in the morning. He looked a lot more nervous this time, was facing away from us the whole time and kinda huddled. Jumpy too. I think we are raising his blood pressure. Driving him to drink perhaps. Anyway, I figured, "this is ridiculous, I'm taking a picture" (normally i really hate interrupting precious moments to go get the camera, like "oh no way! you're a virgin? Ok hang on... ok hold still! say cheese!"... but the third time is not so precious). So i grabbed the polaroid, took a picture (and even though i tried to cover up the flash as much as possible, it still looked like turbo might have had an aneurysm of some sort, and he ran off real fast like), and, of course, he is almost completely indistinguishable in the photo. A brown lump. Goddamn yeti, that turbo.

2) The nice born again christian single mom i mentioned just came back from her honeymoon in jamaica to discover that her 8-year-old freckled cutie decided to get a mohawk while she was gone. I don't want to sound like a perv or nothin, but I'm gonna marry that kid.

3) my wrists huuuuuuuuuuurt bitcha bitcha moan moan moan.

4) No one is talking any sense whatsoever in the digital music debate and it's making me all gassy. I'm writing a long essay on it but it'll be a while before it's ready. Here's a preview: I'm right and they're wrong. Also, Ian told me to tell you not to worry, he's doing it right. So everybody chill and leave this to the professionals, capisce? I KID.